Board Thread:Survivor: Wales (Season 1)/@comment-5001881-20141016144203/@comment-25231782-20141016155134

Doing this at 2AM during the exam period - totally healthy for my sleep cycle~

Aaron, firstly, I'm very glad that we can talk to you again. Despite everything that happened, I really did enjoy all the chats that we had about Twilight, gender, and whatnot. You and I clicked because we have similar senses of humour and ways of viewing the journey of life. And I missed talking to you about... life. I wanted to say that to get that out of the way first.

You're right: we were a tight duo and were like Simon and Garfunkel. I knew that you had my back, and as long as you were around, I'd always be safe. And you are one of the few people that I've met who treated me as... me, rather as Soo the schoolgirl or Susie the braniac or Su the chick who thinks nail polish is weird. And for that, I'm grateful. Why I blindsided you was because I realised that I wanted to win the game. Even though you say that you were okay to lose to me in the FTC, I would've lost to you hands-down. You're that good and charismatic a player. Once you started picking up immunities, you became the Number One threat, and if I willingly went to the end with you, I wouldn't be playing the game. I wanted to be a Tony rather than a Woo, or a Chelsea rather than a Kim.

That leads me to answering your question: you are better than me because you have a kinder heart than me. Me, I got too greedy and was unwilling to simply stay put. I didn't have the same level of compassion and goodness as you, which is what led to my blindside of you. I used you as a shield and then discarded you rather coldly, and one thing that I do regret is that I wish I could've at least given you proper warning. I warned Sarah before I picked Brittany over her because she deserved to be warned of her elimination, but you also deserved to know. At the time, I didn't tell you because I was afraid of your ability to scramble, but in hindsight, I should've handled that better. And that's how you're better than me: more compassion.

Hughes is better than me in that he's certainly more patient than me. If I were on the same tribe as Reid and were stuck on a losing tribe Dyfrgi, I would've gone bonkers and pulled out my hair by Day 10. But Hughes managed to perservere on that Ulong tribe, and he managed to swing Brittany and CJ to vote against Jeffy. I wouldn't have had that patience, and I've never really been able to dictate any of CJ's voting patterns.

Diego is better than me in challenges. Way way way better than me in challenges. Remember that terrible challenge with the black and white dots? The one where Diego was literally the only person to submit anything? I worked on that challenge for ages and couldn't get anything. Diego got a score on that. And in the premerge, he helped Ddraig on its winning streak. I'll readily admit that I'm atrocious at flash games, and Diego excels in that. If this season were all about who is the best at challenges, Diego would be here instead of me.

Jeffy is bolder and more audacious than me. Sometimes, I overanalyse and am not eager to make big moves until what I consider is the right time. One example is when Diego wanted me and him to give sanctuary to Brittany instead of Jeffy, or voting you out over Sarah if nuDdraig went to tribal again, and being a 60 year-old woman that I am (I like smooth Jazz and Judy Garland wtf), I veered on the conservative and shutdown those proposals. And sometimes, this sort of inaction could be costly, since Survivor is all about making moves at the right time. Taking out somebody before they could take you out. Jeffy is not like that; he's dauntless, throwing out moves left, right, and center. And I do need to have more of that manic energy sometimes. If I were unlucky and stuck on Dyfrgi, conservative play and inaction could've killed me, considering the number of times that tribe went to tribal.

CJ is older and has more life experience than me. Whenever I talk to him, I find that he holds a steady job and is busy, not spending that much time on the ORG because he has a real life!! Like that lego brick known as Bella Swan, I'm only 17 and still have so much to learn about the world. I'm sometimes embarassed to admit that i've never had a part-time job or travelled that much. CJ works and feeds himself through money that he earns himself. And that cannot be overemphasised!

Tine is just amazing. I could go on for days about why I think she's amazing, but her taste in movies and music is better than mine. She knows what I'm talking about. Also, Tine is a great listener. Me, I sometimes ramble on and on and on. Maybe I enjoy hearing the sound of my own voice? But Tine? Tine, she listens. She doesn't say much, but after you ramble, she says something or makes a remark that not only reveals that she had listened to everything you had to say but also shows that she ''understands. ''Tine can find things that I might have overlooked, and in a social game like Survivor, the ability to listen and observe is essential. Being a windbag can only go so far.

And Sarah. If I'm like Parvati and Brittany is like Amanda, then Sarah is the Cirie. She deserves to have made the Final Tribal Council, in all honesty. She is hardworking, much more than me, and worked endlessly to ensure that she had immunity. So that we could blindside the immunity-less men. And Sarah deserved far more Tribals than I could have. Coming from Ddraig, I was lucky in many ways. Sarah didn't have that luxury, so she had to work twice as hard to get to where she got. If she were here, I have no doubt that she would win. Her work ethic, likeability, and Denise-esque perserveration after coming from a nearly demolished tribe are all traits that she holds over me.

Aaron, I know that my game was far from perfect, but I do hope that I answered your question. Regardless of whether you vote for me or not, I felt that our friendship was genuine and would be happy to talk to you about Game of Thrones again, and about Daenerys "WHERE ARE MY BABIES" Targaryen. I regret not being as candid with you. And I hope that we can still remain friends.