Board Thread:Survivor 24: Caracol/@comment-186.94.43.39-20170607215537/@comment-27018217-20170607225526

Alright so I'll start by addressing that I did get very busy this part of the year with school and real life, so that did cut down my time to talk quite a bit. But that's not a full excuse for why I spent more of that time talking to Roodman and Anna. The reason for that was because when I feel like someone is against me in the game, I'm struggle a bit in talking with them. Sure I can swallow my pride and work at it if it'll help me get farther, but that's something I struggle with. With Forrest, I would have loved to talk with him more, but in my mind, I was always nervous talking with him. Just scared what might be brought up, scared that we might move to game talk and suddenly I'd have to be lying to him a ton that I could get caught up with. Really, there are numerous small reasons as to why I'd not talk to people as much when I was against them, but the main one is I get really nervous around people who I feel may not like me. I know that sounds pathetic, but it's a thing that I have in real life where if I feel someone doesn't like me, but I don't dislike them, I just have a difficult time talking to them. Truthfully, talking to you was me working on that, because I was aware you were against me in game, but that you had the smallest chance of ACTUALLY disliking me, so I was pushing myself to talk and get to know you, yet it still wasn't enough.

This next part isn't explaining why my game was good, just my thought process on this move.

Now, for that freakout that happened after Thiru was gone. That whole thing was part strategy and part real emotion. Now I know this sounds stupid, but I had a reasonings behind that anger. So I was annoyed about being left out again, and yes a bit angry, but I'm not petty. I knew why you guys did the move, I knew why you guys were leaving me out, but I needed to act like I was hurt a lot more than I was. If talking strategically wasn't going to work with people, why not act desperate. Explain how I felt used, frustrated, maybe seeing if people would pity me. A stupid move, probably a sloppy one, but I was basically trying something new at this point. I guess it worked...I mean you ended up talking to me and working with me to get out Christine. I'm not saying it was a perfect move, but it was something I was willing to try. Also, it did get Christine to want to help me out that round. But it came with the side effect of making me look like a cry-baby and only thinking about myself and I'm sorry for that. It was a strategy, but it was no excuse for how it may have upset anyone, or made me look awful, because it was still my actions. I just wanted you to know my thought process behind that.

Well, I think you should vote for me because some of your views of me, in my opinion, are false. You called me short sighted, but that's was not entierly the case. I was always looking for options until I found something that would work. The plan to have Anna, Roodman and I in the final was something I was pushing for, but I kept my eyes open for anything that could have gotten in the way. Like at the Final 5 vote, once I realized that Roodman was thinking about taking you over Anna, I pushed harder in the Final Immunity to make sure that I'd have a better chance at convincing him to take her over you. I was always on the lookout for what you and the others might be doing, and compared notes with my allies to see if my assumptions were right. One-sided is quite accurate, but only because I felt like I had to be to survive. I needed to put all my energy into working with Roodman and Anna, because I had heard from both that you guys (Forrest, Lori, you) thought I'd have a big chance to win, so likewise if I didn't stick with my allies, I was setting myself up to have to Immunity myself to the end even more.

Finally, the " inability to understand, respect or even care about how and why the other players played the way they did". That is anything but the truth. I was always considered how you guys played. I had to adapt my moves because of the kind of games I saw from you guys. Hell, I agreed Christine was a good target because of how well she was playing overall. That's why during Final 6 I argued for Forrest over Lori to go, and at Final 5 for you to go over Forrest, because it was my understanding that you guys had played stronger games (at least in my eyes). I even argued this with Roodman. This was something that was said during Final 6

"Roodman:  I think any of the three of us (Anna, him and I) would beat any of the other three (Forrest, Lori, you) no question

​Me: Well I think there is questions

Forrest may have been annoying, but he had a great underdog story. He fought hard out of the bottom and would have survived the brink of elimination at Final 6 if we let him go. That's something for him

Luis, even though has flip flopped, has managed to control and manipulate a lot of people"

I defended your games! I acknowledged that you guys had solid cases, and that we wouldn't have it as easy as Roodman seemed to think. And at Final 3, in the Main Chat, so Anna can check this one for you, I said:

"I can't think of a single person (except for maybe Kristen) who was in the merge who didn't have a solid chance at winning"

That right there was an honest statement. I didn't say with ass kissing in mind, I saw arguments that everyone in this jury and that Roodman and I had to win. Luis, I even said it to your face I respected you, that I respected Forrest, and that wasn't just as people. I respected the the types of games you were playing, and that's why I wanted you guys gone, because it wasn't just that I didn't think you would take me to the end, but I was less confident that I could beat you, Forrest and maybe even Lori, then I did over Roodman. I don't want anyone on the jury thinking I didn't work with you and didn't want to go to the end with you, JUST because I had more of a personal connection with Roodman and Anna. If I thought it was a different case, I would have acted, and I have previous games to prove that. And I have always shown respect for people's games in the past, as in a previous Survivor game, I voted for a person to win who had used me the entire fucking game and had even made me cry at one point, because I believed he played the best game and I respected everything he did.

So Luis, you should vote for me because a lot of your views of me and my game were based on shit I felt I needed to do to survive, and I'm sad that those were the impressions I left on you. Also, I acknowledge my faults and work to show why my game is better than Roodman's, while Roodman is more focused on proving he had the best game out of everyone. I always had respect for the players in the game and what they did (even if I didn't always share that), while Roodman was convinced that he played better than almost all of us (except Anna).

Great game Luis, I'm glad you stay true to your views and point out my flaws, because I'm going to be sure to try and fix those for games in the future. Love ya man!

