I Love Chaos And I Have No Pity/Confessionals

Day 34
"einigkeit"

- "I'm just gonna take this time to make a quick confessional to say WOW me Nora and Miles all made a chat so we could talk strategy for the challenge w each other and help each other make moves to block AJ? And if actually paid off I'm literally shook bc I was the one who ended up blocking her, at first she came into my PMs yelling at me but I forgave her bc I understood where her frustration was coming from. If she had won the challenge she basically won the game and if she lost the challenge then she was gonna be voted off. Part of me feels so happy voting AJ after her refusing to talk strategy w me for so long while I was on the bottom, but another part of me feels empathy for her bc she honestly played the best game out of everyone out here and even if we never got a long in a game sense I have soooo much respect for her, so I suppose at the end of the day it's a bitter sweet feeling, but I'm obviously voting for her this tribal bc this is not a friends game, I'm actually trying to win/do well. ANYWAYS I'm legit so so proud of me and Nora rn!! We've overcome all these odds of being on the bottom since the very beginning and basically made it to the f4!! I love Nora so much and I couldn't have asked for a better partner in crime Im worried I'm going to have to cut her at f4 tho just bc I wanna go to FTC w Matt and Miles since they're the biggest goats and me and Nora have very similar games and I already have no idea how to write an FTC speech and so I think that would add to the struggle. But I'll cross the bridge of voting out Nora when I get there bc who knows she could win immunity Also I know I said this would be short but it's slightly longer than I expected LOL "

Day 36
"einigkeit"

- "THE FINALE! I made it! I'm so proud of myself for being able to make it this far in the game, like Final 4? That's the furthest I've ever made it in an ORG. I'm just so happy and excited like, I actually have a chance at winning this thing! One more challenge, and then if I make it to the Final Tribal Council, I can hopefully pull out the win and become 703's next Sole Survivor.

After last night's tough vote of Anna, today has just been super quiet because it's ROP day and really there isn't too much need for a social game now that we're heading so close to the end. I am bit worried it means they want to vote me out 3-1 because I am the biggest threat left in the game, and there's gonna be one vote out left, so I need to work my ass off in the upcoming immunity challenge.

My goal going forward is just to take whoever I can to the end. I feel like I could beat all 3 of the other people left, so really I need to ensure that I win immunity, so I don't end up in any kind of firemaking scenario, because that'd be hell and I'd probably go out 4th like Torsa in Bora Bora.

I'm still in shock that I made it to the Final 4 and here's to hoping I become the 38th winner of 703 Survivor!"

Day 37
"einigkeit"

- "The final immunity challenge was posted and I've just been so stressed and down about it. The four trials are things that I'm absolute shit at, and it's just heartbreaking to know I'm probably not going to be able to secure my spot in the Final 3.

I've been trying not to give in and give up, but it's a tough mental battle. In my head, it could just be easier to give up and be less sad if I were to get voted out, but I feel like I'd disappoint those rooting for me, and past and future versions of myself. I need to work up the motivation and try my hardest to make it to the end.

I've never ever made it this far in the past, and I'm not gonna give up now. Despite being at my lowest point during this game, I'm gonna fight to the bitter end. I am getting my full redemption arc, not just making it this far, but proving myself by winning. Proving that I am a valid player and to make a name for myself in this community and game I love so deeply. I'm here to win, and tomorrow I will try like I have never have in getting that immunity win and proving myself."

Day 38
"einigkeit"

- "I didn't make confessionnals since a long so let's go. F6: Me and Willow had the choice between sending home Felix or Matt. I approached Felix to ask him to vote Matt, he was okay because Anna and Matt won’t ever vote against each other and Felix wants a chance to win. I talked to Anna later and she told me that she is okay to send Felix home and explained me they were going to make a split vote (2 on me 2 on willow and 2 on Felix from me and willow) but she will vote Felix in revote LOL So I was supposed to just say “yeah, let’s do this revote between me and Felix”. I know she was really willing to vote Felix to keep me and Matt safe in game but going to revote isn’t an option I wanted to risk. My main concern on voting Matt was how to plan Felix’s voting out in next round? I told Anna I believe her on revoting Felix if revote, she swore to me that she didn’t’ want me out so I said YES to the revote plan. If I vote Matt out, I would lose Annajane trust and loyalty and Felix will gain annajane’s protection it would become difficult and hard to take him down in the future. But MATT is anajane’s buddy -> he will never vote AJ out even if she lose an immunity chall and rn WE NEED SOMEONE WILLING TO VOTE AJ OUT IF WE HAVE AN OCCASION!!! Felix told me the morning that Miles and Matt were AJ’s buddies and they won’t ever vote her out.HESITATION AND CONFUSION are in my heads. I need to know where Miles really stands! Will Miles be loyal to AJ or will play for his own game? My vote tonight will depend on Miles’ loyalty. If he Is willing to vote out AJ / Matt next rounds, I can vote Felix out this round (I keep AJ Trust and I send home a strategic threat) BUT If Miles is with AJ, I wouldn’t have another option than working with Felix to take Matt out bc he will be the only one to help us on targeting AJ. So I confronted Miles and he revealed me that he has the eburone idol, he will vote AJ when occasion wil be there and he will vote Matt if AJ win next immunity chall. He told me that he was supposed to vote me in their split vote plan but won’t so he will use the idol on Willow. Hopefully, he accepted to idol me after I convinced him that willow could probably have the idol. BIM! Tribal! Idol and split vote!"

"einigkeit"

- F5: All we want is sending the biggest threat home. Me, willow and Miles are waiting for the challenge to have a chance on taking AJ out. I think one of my fav moments in the game is when we worked together during the challenge, our lovely alliance chat, our advices to each other and the moment when AJ can’t move anymore OMG ICONIC you’re dead queen of Ahr! No more lies, no more deal, I’m writing your name down, I’m writing it so fast! Part of my heart is sad because I appreciated AJ, she is so likeable and lovely and she helped me to survive in some occasions. I loved when us 2 were talking business: vote, strategy or just diet. Even if we were opposites, we became allies. I was a good ally for her; she was a good ally for me. You played very well my dear but bye, be the queen of Ahr and let me be the queen of Rhineland! Love you anajane

"einigkeit"

- "F4: Thanks to God, I won the final immunity challenge. It gives me more legitimacy to the final win! YES! For tonight vote, i will target the person who could probably beat me in the end and its Miles. He is a sweet young boy who played a good social game and have been kind with every juror! His “supposed” big move is not a really one for me. It was a flashy move, not a big move. What makes a move a big and good one? For me, it benefits your game in short and IN LONG TERM and imo flipping on Felix didn’t benefit Miles game; flipping on Matt would be a smarter move for him. It wasn’t a good move because he is alone right now, with no one, no ally to get his back and he is the biggest threat. He has kept Felix; Felix would be the vote of this F4 and not him!! Boy, F4 isn’t a safe place to go alone tu tu tu! Then, there was another alternative where felix would be voted out in F6 even if Miles didn’t move so all the credit isn’t for him I bet. You flipped a bit too late Miles, you would flipped a bit earlier, you and me would have a solidified relationship, I would be 100% grateful to you because you would have risked your game to save me; I would never vote you now! But you flipped too late, you waited for the “safe” occasion to move: getting immunity, last tribal to use idol, too late for me too to give you all my loyalty after all these tribals you were hesitating! Now our relation is precarious! I love you from the bottom of my heart as a person but your acts didn’t worked me out enough to get 200% my loyalty! Anyway, I feel the win coming to me! Survivor is a game of opportunity and I took every opportunity, when there was no one, I provoked opportunity! I want the F3 being a F3 of Underdog and goats because the underdog will win. I am from Eburone, I want Conquest and Glory, I love chaos and I have no pity to those who oppose me. I am a cutthroat and I need to be a cutthroat one last time even if it breaks my heart! Love you Miles"

"einigkeit"

- "The end is here.

Tonight is the night I go home and even though I was so close, my preformance in the Final Immunity Challenge just wasn't enough.

I was praying that they wouldn't vote me out, but it's inevitable because I have friends on the jury who like me. I had just really wanted to make it to the end and prove myself and not be forgotten into obscurity because I have only like 1 friend in this community.

I loved this game so much, and I had a blast playing it. Even though I'm getting 4th place, I am so thankful for the opportunity to return and play again on 703. I had tried my best to win and redeem myself, but it wasn't enough. I really hope I get another opportunity on 703 in the future to finally kick ass and win it.

Peace out. <3"