Everyone is Just On Edge/Confessionals

Day 16
"edessa"

- So a LOT has happened since my last conf. The swap went AMAZINGLY. I was scared of being swap fucked, but I got SWAP LUCKED! Beauty majority, woohoo! Except poor Adam got stuck all alone on the other tribe. You know how I said in a previous conf that before the swap I suggested that whichever beauties got the best swap position should throw to save whoever got swapfucked, but I wasn't counting on them to actually do it? Well Liam Nicole Augusto and Luca actually wanted to throw to save Adam. And as I said in that previous conf, I wanted people to throw to save me if I got swapfucked, but I didn't necessarily want to throw to save him. Konrad/Charlie/Linus could have idols. I'd throw without hesitation if Luca or Adam or Liam got swapfucked, but as much as I love Adam I'd rather not risk our own lives in the game for him. I wouldn't mind going to Tribal, I just wasn't a fan of throwing deliberately. But luckily we didn't have to debate whether or not to throw since the other tribe obliterated us before we even got the chance to start finding items. Two brawns and only one brain, so we got rid of the one to avoid making unnecessary enemies of the two. And Augusto offered to let us throw his name out to Konrad as the fake boot. THANK YOU AUGUSTO for making my life less stressful. I would NEVER EVER let my own name be thrown out like that. I don't like risking being idol'd out even if the risk is small, and votes against look ugly on a wiki chart. But ofc Konrad didn't pull out an idol so yay! At the next challenge we agreed that Adam had gotten enough days to socialize and hopefully improve his position over on Chalcedon 2.0, so we played to win. We didn't win, so Charlie went home and now Linus is the last non-beauty standing. At the very bottom, waiting to be picked off by the beauties. But Linus has talked to me more than Nicole has, I like Linus and he likes me. I would love for him to stay around, and I could see us working together at the merge. Linus voted with us against Konrad and Charlie and he claims he wants to work with Edessa, but he could easily side against us at the merge when he's clearly on the bottom of the Edessa group. Plus, trying to get the numbers to save him next round could easily backfire. I'm happy to be on the same tribe as Linus, but it just sucks to see him trapped in such a hopeless swap position and I want both him and all the beauties to survive so badly. I'm just praying Edessa 2.0 starts winning immunity.

"edessa"

- Before Charlie was voted out, he told me in his scrambling that Justin had the brawn idol. Justin was his closest ally, and told him. I think Charlie was trying to prove himself trustworthy by revealing information, but saying "hey I'm in a power couple with an idol" didn't exactly help his case.

If it's true, Justin having the idol is BAD news for me. As much as I just want to apologize for being a dick in the past and make amends with him, he probably won't even want to speak to me, let alone work with me. The power of an idol makes it much easier for him to get rid of me. And there's still that mystery 4th tribe on the wiki that can't be the merge tribe since it already has a name. The possibility of having 4 tribes of 3 at final 12 absolutely TERRIFIES me. I could easily end up like Charlie Konrad and Linus, completely numbers fucked by random chance with no means to save myself. And if I end up on a 3 person tribe with Justin, I'm done for if we lose immunity.

"chalcedon"

- Howdy, so the reward challenge we had to set someone as our representative for a 1v1. Naturally though, no one volunteered and we had to random.org it. I personally didn't volunteer because I didn't want to be in the spotlight and draw unnecessary attention to myself. I'm sure that's what everyone else on the tribe thought to, if not just out of sheer laziness which I understand. That's also part of why I didn't volunteer. Andre got selected and I have absolutely no faith in him winning but it was funny how silent the chat was until he got picked and everyone exploded into wishing him good luck.

I did some talking with Adam and I really don't know what to make of him. There's like no way this guy could be that nice without an ulterior motive in this kinda game like really! He also called me a smol bean or innocent which is like really weird considering I talk about butts and swear on a consistent basis in the tribe chat. I don't entirely trust him but I may or may not need him.

Also, I haven't bothered to check for the idols because of how many clues there were on this tribe. There's absolutely no way that no one has found the idol yet. Gotta be wary of who though.

"edessa"

- Today, we’re celebrating cause I actually didn’t get a vote for the first time in this game! I lowkey wanted to see how long I could last without getting votes, but this is totally fine with me. Also, I made it to my favorite number pretty much, so I’m content with my experience now ghfjdks (jk, I can and will win (‘: )

"edessa"

- Before the last tribal, Linus and I had a really good conversation about the game so far. I asked him if my name has been tossed by anyone because I was feeling unsure about everything, which totally isn’t true but I wanted to see if my mess of a strategy was catching any fish. He told me that it has and if we wanted, we could make a move that round. While I would’ve loved that, I didn’t connect with Charlie on a game level so I declined but Linus and I agreed that we’d link up and potentially pull in Luca if we go to tribal again. I’m SHOOK by the fact that my strategy of having others think I’m on the bottom actually works. Linus is crucial for my game at the moment since my game has been isolated to the same group of people since Day 1 and if we were to swap or even merge, I’d be fucked. Having people think I’m on the low end of the totem pole from the outside totally makes me someone others can approach and even having someone like Linus put in a good word for me with his allies puts me in a better position. I want to be the Trojan Horse in this game, I want to infiltrate then divide and conquer to win the battle and eventually the war. It’s definitely risky and borderline stupid, but this is a game and I came to have some fun so why not walk a slippery slope?

"edessa"

- Linus decides to be our knight in shining armor and win the mystery hero challenge for Edessa! Despite the fact that my crazy ass totally expected this reward to be a swap cover-up (and I even mentioned this to Linus), I’m happy that my tribe won so we can win that next immunity challenge! I don’t want to draw a line in the sand right now, so winning the challenge is my goal at the moment.

Day 17
"chalcedon"

- GODAMMIT NOW JUSTIN KNOWS I HAVE AN IDOL UFHIHFIDHFD. this makes me worried like how many other people know? now im scared that i might get blindsided with it or be forced to waste it.... :(

"edessa"

- Who knew I was half decent at color-coded puzzles! I sound like a broken record, but everyone and their mother knows I suck at challenges so I’m proud I’m actually doing THAT. Let’s just hope everyone decides to do THAT too or else my game is lowkey fucked (:

"edessa"

- Everyone seems to be doing pretty great so far, so I’m happy! Who knows, the other tribe could do better but I seriously feel good about this. I haven’t talked game with anybody other than Linus at the moment cause it could spread like wildfire, but if we just so happen to lose, best believe I’m turning on the switch and turning up the heat.

"chalcedon"

- Time for an update. So Adam, as nice a guy as he seems, isn't coming across too well imo. He added all us brawns to an alliance chat with him without properly asking us, and keeps saying things like "We gotta stick together".

Well to be honest mate, I'm not too sure if I do wanna stick with you. There are 6 beauties left in the game, and also, siding with Adam would mean a tie 4-4 and rocks... cos for this vote I can't see the brains splitting up as they'd be too worried about being in the minority. I'm sorry but I'm not going out on rocks this early in the game... not worth it for someone who will probs just go back to the beauties at merge.

I've been trying to convince Sam and Justin that tying it is not the best option for us. I feel like we can convince someone to flip if we end up going tribal again, like Claire or Andre maybe. I've made some good connections with them so I'm hopeful.

Day 18
"chalcedon"

- So as expected we lost immunity. Linus + flash game + 10% boost is just a recipe for disaster. I scored the highest on our tribe by a decent margin and that might affect the vote. I mean, it shouldn't because I doubt any other flash game or challenge the rest of the season will come close to how this one was played.

In any case, I gotta hustle. I haven't been bonding as much as I should but I doubt a few more talks asking about weather is going to amount to a lot. I really don't think that tribal divisions are going to play a role in this tribal. They shouldn't at least. I have no idea who a possible target could be but I have this idol. I'm planning to play it no matter what but I'll see what the others say. I have some intelligence gatherers in Claire and Adam (if he actually trusts me). I just hope that there's some strategy talk before the vote instead of going down to the wire again. I don't think I'm in the position to unleash an aggressive playstyle yet considering how unaware I am of current tribal lines. Here's to hoping I survive I guess.

"chalcedon"

- Ok so when the challenge came out, Adam was like “omg I can’t do this because I have a volleyball tourney and youth group” or whatever he said. Now me thinking “hmm he never mentioned that before so that’s weird???” And then I thought “this bitch lying” and I did a whole VL on it lmao so Adam is a little crafty bitch and you gotta watch him 👀👀👀

"chalcedon"

- We lost the challenge because Linus carried his tribe (why can’t I be on a tribe with a challenge beast 😩😩😩) to a win. So now we have to go to tribal and sis idgaf as long as it ain’t me 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽 Tea tea tea

"edessa"

- WE WON YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSS! Not only am I safe, but my game is too! I don’t have to show my cards and I’m super thankful, but now I’m just nervous for Adam. From the outside looking it, it seems like Adam is the easy boot since the Beauties have the most members still in the game with 6-4-4 and if they think a swap will happen soon like I do, that could very well be the route the other tribe decides to take. Obviously, that’d be awful for my game since Adam is a member of the River Vixens along with Luca and myself. However, I do think Adam is a social threat so getting him out of here wouldn’t be the worst thing to ever happen. I just hope that he can come out of that Sticky Situation (by Baylor Wilson, please buy it on iTunes now) since he’s an awesome guy and a person on my side. Let’s start praying, fam.

"chalcedon"

- i don't wanna run the brawns but the 3 of them are willing to let me call the shots especially since i kinda took that position after Hesh left so i want it to be a group decision and it's not a hard choice for me BUT i don't wanna be in a premerge power position and then fuck around and be a early merge boot so that's why i'm trying to say "ok guys we need this to be a group decision" and at the same time keep Justin safe because he's my connection to Linus at the merge/swap so idk im nervous. i don't think i'm a target but i don't wanna mess my game up but being too aggressive

"chalcedon"

- Everyone's calling this vote a mess but I mean this is what Chalcedon had to deal with each vote so oh well. From what I can gather it's a vote between Adam and a brawn. Apparently the brawns had a chat with Adam about voting Andre but then Adam leaked that out and now they're turning on Adam for self preservation. The thing about voting out Adam is that it kind of makes sense. I mean, there are a lot of beauties left in the game and they do seem tightly knit. I'd ask him how close he was with the other beauties but there's no way he'd respond in an unfavorable way since his ass is on the line. The issue that Andre brought up is that the brawns are being really wishy washy about bringing up Andre's name and had some conflicting stories. The problem with voting a brawn is that one of them probably has an idol and we don't know who. I mean they'd probably idol out Andre which, fucking whatever, but still. Also as mentioned earlier, keeping Adam would mean possibly being in a higher vote deficit when facing the beauties if they stick together come merge. Also, it's no secret that Tyler is close with Justin and obviously they trust each other a whole lot. I'm worried with how much Andre is pushing to go against Justin and the brawns, Tyler may consider flipping and voting with them. As you can see, the vote is still a work in progress considering we don't even have a brawn target yet.

On the bright side, my name and Claire's name haven't come up at all and that's really all I care about at this point.

"chalcedon"

- And I wanna trust Sam but apparently none of the other Brains trust him like ughhh Sam why you gotta be messy smh bruh and Charlie is apparently being messy too & Adam is shadily aggressive + i think that bitch was lying about that volleyball/youth group shit on some Chris NL shit (but Chris lies better than he does) and Justin seems to be the most sane but like what if Justin is gaming me jbvasdkf IM SO CONFUSED BRUH UGHHH

"chalcedon"

- i'm actually deadass worried bout this vote, like it's so messy and so many different things have been said by different people and omg it's so nervewracking. like ive tried to work up my social game to make sure im not the target to the brains, esp to claire/tyler and andre. but idk with adam being weary and everything, everyone is just on edge and i feel somehow the target is gonna end up being me. i mean i have an idol, but i really dont want to play it this early, and i especially dont want to use it and find out i wasnt the vote lol. like it's pretty damn clear that adam has been overplaying and tryna play everyone by saying what they want to hear cause he's SUPER obvious about all that. but theres still the fact that there is 4 brains and 3 brawn, and all they gotta do is pull in adam and boom one of us are gone. and i just feel they'll go for me over the other 2. and with this whole adam spilling the tea about andre being the vote and us calling him out for it. i have no doubt that he's gonna try and get in with those 4 now. it really all comes down to if the brains actually do want to vote adam and decrease the beauty number, or easily pull him in and chop on of our heads. idk man like i said ive been trying to work up the social game to make sure im not the target, but maybe ive tried a little too hard to make people feel weary or threatened by me... all i know is we DEFINITELY aint going to a simple 4-4 tiebreaker lmfao

"chalcedon"

- basically me right now: it's getting really late, and im still not exactly sure who to vote for. or who the brains are voting whether it really is adam or one of us. but all i know and im not sure if ive made this clear. but i REALLY dont want to waste my idol, but i also REALLY dont feel safe

"chalcedon"

- like ive said, so far this game all ive worked on his 1 on 1 social relationships, making a legit bond with everyone. and i definitetly feel i made them when we were on our winning streak, but now with tribal coming, who knows what the brains have told one another. maybe they've all been saying "sam said this and this to me, he seems to be kissing ass. lets get rid of him" or some shit. so as i feel ive definitely played well socially, i also feel it could just as easily bite me in the ass and get me voted off. ahhhh i hate tribals they're so stressful :(. but on a side note though, it was fun as fuck tryna manipulate adam in our alliance chat haha. cause we're still probably gonna vote him.

"chalcedon"

- sorry im making so many confessionals now.... this is just really crazy. i forgot to mention that justin told me adam knew the location for the beauty idol, but failed to mention to him there was a riddle to solve. just that the spot was "empty" which is suspect as fuck cause if he did find the spot and there was no idol, whats the harm of saying there was a riddle to solve to lol. holy fuck so maybe adam has an idol too and he already feels in the hot seat.... so maybe he'll play one? oh god this just got even more complicated

"chalcedon"

- i honestly dont think ive played ANY of my previous vivor games near as messy as im playing this one vote. like im legit all over the place LMAO. ngl though it's kinda fun. makes things exciting. although it probably isnt looking good for me lol

"chalcedon"

- Lemme tell y’all how Sam said he couldn’t trust me yet I’m literally the least messy of the 8 people at tribal like 🙄🙄🙄 bruh wyd and then I literally helped save his ass because Claire wanted his head on a fucking platter. Like excuse me sir how about you chill tf out before you get snatched cuz you’re TRIPPING just vote Adam because it’s legit best for all of us and shut up damn

"chalcedon"

- Lemme tell y’all how Sam said he couldn’t trust me yet I’m literally the least messy of the 8 people at tribal like 🙄🙄🙄 bruh wyd and then I literally helped save his ass because Claire wanted his head on a fucking platter. Like excuse me sir how about you chill tf out before you get snatched cuz you’re TRIPPING just vote Adam because it’s legit best for all of us and shut up damn

"chalcedon"

- So quick recap before vote results. Claire and Adam had a plan that I was a part of. Adam told us about his idol and he would idol himself, taking out Andre while we voted for him and acted ignorant. Again, I am so okay with Andre going. But, Adam told Tyler about it and then Tyler told all the brains (aka Andre) so that was dumb. I had to clean up after him to get everyone to vote him like we planned. Hopefully this all still works out because the benefits of the planned outcome are too good to pass up.

"chalceodn"

- I almost wish I didn't find this idol ngl. It's been making me play so reckless and well... Stupidly lmao. Cause I was trying really hard to try and figure out who exactly the brains were going for and if we had Adam or not to try and play it correctly. But instead I was scrambling way too much to figure everything out and now its made me out to be really untrustworthy. I honestly dont know if that has made me the target, cause I sure as hell know its raised some eyebrows. I'm just worried ill waste it and not have it next vote if we don't merge after this, which we probably won't, and if we lose the next immunity challenge, I'd be completely fucked. Its all a matter of high risk high reward, and I just dont know which path to take. My gut is telling me not to use it, but my brain is telling me better to be safe than sorry.