Board Thread:Survivor 24: Caracol/@comment-24207263-20170513163900/@comment-26703314-20170513180740

Oh this is exciting! I've had the pleasure of hosting ALL of my fellow loved ones! Yep, it's true. So I personally know that all of you are such tragic flops that you could only ever return to 703 as loved ones. Except of course for Miguel. He's good enough to return on an all-flop season and he's currently going to tribal council because he and his tribe don't understand spellcheck.

On the topic of Miguel! How does it feel knowing you both got to choose your FTC opponent, AND get rid of a juror that was voting for them and you STILL lost? You're the anti-Michele Fitzgerald. I'd say what happened in El Salvador was surprising but I also watched you lose The Ganges so I saw it coming let's be honest. Maybe next time "look" at your gameplay before losing FTC again!

Elmo! Everyone's favor....uh....everyone's existing San Marcos contestant! You know the hosts constantly joked about and roasted the Quetzal tribe for being boring. I'd say you were the exception but really when you're less memorable than Jalen you know you have a problem. I have to congratulate you for winning Bang-A-Rang but you're not the only San Marcos flop who achieved that. And Garen mechanics roast themselves so that'll be it for now.

Is that THE Chris? Oh my god, Chris I love you. You know I admire you. Most guys wouldn't show their faces after they got lead around and carried through a game by a teenage girl but you're still standing tall! I mean anyone with self respect would look at your game in SM and would never want to show their face around here again. Yet...you know. Here you are. That's like sooooo admirable, thank you so much for showing that inner strength. You are my hero, which is good because that's the only kind of hero you'll ever be!

Malik! Speaking of people who got carried by Claudia. You know I love you, it's all in good fun. I'm glad you came out here to join the semi-reunion. I'm surprised you were able to pull your head out of Ella's ass long enough to do it but I'm happy! I have to say my favorite moment hosting you in San Marcos was during the rock draw. Of course that was until I realized you wouldn't be one of the people eligible to get rocked out. Then my enjoyment definitely dropped. You definitely showed a lot of potential in San Marcos, hopefully there's a season soon for players who went too early and you're on it! <3

and last and...debatably not least, Gevonte! My fellow third place goddess. Now people don't know this! People don't know this but this is true, the reason I was removed as a host from El Salvador is because I couldn't stand your dryness! I had to beg Thomas, please either make these contestants do something interesting or pull the trigger Piglet. And obviously, knowing you and what eventually happened, the second option was the only option. We may share being 3rd place, but at least I outlasted people like Miguel G and Nick City. Like who did you beat? Tae? The person who may or may not have actually existed? Mr 10 Inches? Max- oh no wait. You actually LOST to Max! In conclusion, the fact that you allowed Gibby to happen is all that I need to close out this roast.