I Ain't Getting Dick/Confessionals

Day 4
"azorella"

- Whew!!! I just put an hour or so into writing down every single season's boot-list for this damn challenge.

Seriously, do you hosts WANT me to break all of my fingers so I have to self-evacuate myself? Jeeeeez!

I mean, all jokes aside, I'm sure Thomas was hoping that would end up occurring. There was a part of him that really, truly wanted to hear, 'Aren's in the hospital because he broke his FUCKING FINGERS' from my bro Cecil, I'm sure.

Now, challenge stuff aside, I've just been making bonds, really. Now that we have the alliance set up, I should be alright. I'm also very strong at challenges, so even if somebody was to renegade on this alliance, I doubt they'd try to blindside me - because I'm a big force in this tribe winning challenges.

That being said, ya never know. People might want to vote me out for that very reason - because I'm too much of a threat for when the merge hits. Even though the merge is probably a month or so away.

"couvreux"

- Daulton went home without a hitch. I've actually made good bonds with some people, and I just need to keep the target off myself. It's gonna be fun on a bun

"gallieni"

- In all honesty it still feels kind of surreal that I'm still here, on this season. Like any moment I'm just expecting the other shoe to drop and for me to just, I don't know, go home. For now though I seem to be in a decent position in terms of like the tribe hierarchy.

So here's the rundown: the other day, Nifty made a 5-person alliance of him, myself, Miguel, Nick, and Felix. Other than Nick not my first choice of allies but you know what? I'm glad I'm in a damn alliance in the first place. So yeah I'm sitting kinda pretty in the majority but I do feel conflicted because I really wanted to work with Trent. Like compared to everyone else here I find it easier to talk to him, which isn't saying much because I find it hard to talk to almost everyone here (yay my bad conversational skills). So hopefully we don't lose challenges at all and I don't have to go with the flow of leaving Trent/Andy/Ryan out of these votes because I can see myself working closely with them down the line somehow.

Also dammit Corvreux y'all did Daulton dirty omfg. If Zak wasn't on that tribe I'd be rooting for nothing but failure for them until the swap. But real talk, I am bummed about Daulton leaving. In just those few days I think we did form a pretty good bond and I would've loved to work with someone who I already considered a friend later on. But guess it wasn't meant to be ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"gallieni"

- So, this game is going pretty smoothly so far I think. Most of my tribe has been, evidently, too scared to really talk game with anyone. My alliance of five is now most likely scared of talking game to the three outsiders, and especially revealing this alliance to them due to possibly being targeted first and getting a placement worse than 20th. And it's not something that I'm enforcing--most of these people are just skittish to talk game in general. It's not just those in my alliance, it's those on the outside too. I talked to Andy and Trent more, one on one ya know, and I acted like no one was talking game at all and was kind of uncomfortable and scared about it and they responded with, ""Oh my god, I've felt the same way."" So, its good to know that just about everyone here is skittish and afraid of talking game. Or so I think. I still feel like the alliance has been leaked out by now, or could easily get leaked out, but for the time being I think I have my bases covered well enough.

Meanwhile, I've just felt more and more comfortable around Nick so I decided to go up to him today and just essentially tell him that he's my #1 and I wanna be a strong duo with him, 'cause that is really what I want here. I haven't talked as much game with anyone else as I have with him, he just seems to be a nice balance to some of my traits, and if I can establish a duo here early on enough--someone who can lean on me, and I can lean on them, and we can just trust each other 100% in this game--then that helps me out a lot in this game. I feel like he's reciprocated the feelings, 'cause he told me about Felix and him having an F2 deal as well (which I naturally sensed, since Nick talked about Felix quite a bit in our couple of chats so I figured they just had a thing going.) So, I feel like this is the start of a great duo. That is, if he isn't just using me and keeping around Felix as his true #1 instead. That'd suck. I'll trust Nick entirely for now though, I don't see any sort of harm in it at the moment.

"couvreux"

- Lets start off with Julia: THIS GIRL COMES UP TO ME WITH AN ALLIANCE DAY ONE AND WE HAVE A SHOWMANCE BUT NOW A DAYS I JUST THIS GIRL SAY SHES SLEEPING LIKE FIRST OF ALL SWEEITEI YOU CANT SLEEO FOR 18 hours a day, and she can't even wake up at 5 am to do the challenge like DO YOU WANT US TO LOSE Kevin: ALL YOU TALK ABOUT IS YOUR FUCKING JOB, SHUT THE FUCK UP, I THOUGHT YOU LEFT THE ORG 3 YEARS AGO AND YOU KEEP COMING BACK AND YOU TRY TO WIN. BUT YOU ALWAYS FLOP AND WOULD NEVER. YOU SUCK SOCIALLY WE ONLY KEEPING YOU CAUSE OF YOUR CHALLENGES Hunter: YOU ONLY TALK TO ME WHEN YOUR IN TROUBLE -__- ZAK: IM TIRED OF YOUR "MOOD" and "LIT" LIKE SAY SOMETHING ELSE YOU LOSER Charlie: YOURE MORE FAKE THANK IKA WONG

"azorella"

- I'm desperately awaiting immunity results right now, along with the rest of my tribe. I reaaaaaally hope we won this one; actually because I want the idol-clue more than anything. YES, if you can't already tell, I REALLY REALLY REALLY want that damn idol in my pocket.

As far as I know, my alliance is tight, and my bonds are strong. I've also noticed that Josephine likes to call George 'Selly', and that's the kinda nickname you'd give to a friend? o_o so, are they closer than I think or something...? Huh, guess it's a theory to devote some thought towards.

Well, all that matters is that if we lose immunity, I should be safe... And hopefully I can find that pesky little idol.

"couvreux"

- So we're the flop ass messes who go to every single tribal council. Anyways, during the challenge Joan was getting so heated and pissed at Julia I was honestly living. I could literally feel him simmering with rage the entire challenge in my PMs and was ready to boot her on the spot. Luckily for me and the alliance that's keeping me safe until swap, he cooled down after the challenge was over and we knew we lost, and now he spills tea about Julia wanted to pull in Joan and Charlie into our alliance - which I'm fine with, tbh, but that leaves Hunter and Kevin on the outs. I like them both but I would prefer to keep Hunter because it really sounds like he hasn't made many bonds since the one world chat and if we choose to save him he may be inclined go working with us down the line, especially since he has been talking to me more than Kevin has. But hes probably talking to everyone.

"couvreux"

- OKAY NEVER MIND! The flops won by a technicality I'm so shook. I'm so happy not to be going back to tribal even though I wouldn't have been voted out or anything. I've never felt so secure on a tribe before ever in my life like... I'm so confused? It's probably gonna change real quick but I woulda been fine with going to tribal this round at least. I hope I dont sound too delusional reading this shit back in a few months.

"azorella"

- I'm so glad we won! I love this tribe and it would've been hard to vote one of them out. We all mix well and I hope we'll go far together. It's weird when I'm super positive like that so it must means this is good... or not.

"couvreux"

- This just goes to show if you go into something with absolutely no expectations of success and you do succeed you'll be feeling so lit afterwards. I'm proud of my flop tribe.

"azorella"

- Aren is my closest and only ally, and we're gonna have to get a bigger alliance going to get a majority on this tribe. We both bonded well with Josephine and Cali, so that would be our four. We're gonna wait until next round to talk to them about it though, since we just won immunity and we don't want to overplay our hand.

Day 5
"gallieni"

- I was gonna make a video confessional for this but I lost my SD card for my camera and my iPhone doesn't have enough storage space to record video, rip.

Anyways, I initially felt really shitty about making such a minor mistake for our tribe. It felt like I wasted everyone's time and it was a little crushing that one of us would be going partially due to me. However, then I realized...this is an online game. I shouldn't be beating myself up about this. I have a solid alliance of five who're all telling me they want to stick together and stay strong, and I'm still doing my best to socialize with the three people outside of the alliance to make them feel more comfortable. I need to realize that there are times to play with emotion, and times to play with my mind, and this is definitely a time to play with my mind as we're going to our first tribal and we need to decide who goes home first from this tribe.

I'm going to get everyone organized in the alliance chat and we'll talk about how we feel about the three others. We're gonna come to an agreed decision about this. No one's thoughts will be left out, not by me at least. I'm gonna secure my spot to survive this tribal and make it go the way I want it to--with my alliance still secure, and me still in the best possible spot on this tribe.

"azorella"

- I asked Aren that we should form a bigger alliance than just us two because in my original season I was left out of all alliances (Thx Tyler) and wanted to make it sooner rather than later. I got him to show me his cards and who he'd like. I was hoping he'd say Adrian but.. no.

He mentioned Cali (who I 100% love) and Josephine... I mentioned my Josephine blowup with him but told him I'd like to work with her if it meant fixing our relationship. I also spilled a little rumour about her #1 being Zakriah.

Anyway I'm aligned with Aren, Cali and Josephine now. I'm gonna use them to protect Adrian who is my #1, who I told about the alliane. And I talk to Marie pretty regularly. I also told Jenna that our past is our past and we're gonna squash it and work together.

Marie almost lost us the challenges both times, but at least she does her best. I'd like to keep her around but I feel like it's an unsaid thing that she'd go home first. Idealy Marie or George would go home first (since there's no way in hell I can get Josephine out)

"gallieni"

- i missed a day! sigh, this game does wonders to me and my nervous system. so i left work thinking "great, we got this in the bag" but NOPE, nifty decided to mess up during the minoan empire, so here we are, at tribal council. he took responsibility for his actions, and i'm telling people "oh its ok he shouldnt go home for this" but in reality i want his ass gone. his one mistake is what cost us this challenge and if it weren't for him couvreux would be going to tribal right now. but that's that on that. what makes this even BETTER is ryan's bum ass apparently only talked to me and miggy because now people want him gone... ryan what are you doing?!!! literally i'm probably going to have to vote out my closest ally on day 5 crikey. so now i gotta reshift my focus and work on making an alliance with nathan miguel and felix in place of ryan. which sucks sooooo much because i remember how upset ryan was when he got voted out last time and this time won't be any better. so now i've got this golden idea. miguel and i want to save ryan, so we're gonna try and see if we can flip the target over onto nick or nifty. if not whatever no biggie, but i can't afford to lose ryan without trying to keep him around and my best way to do that is to convince nathan that he needs him around, since ryan wants to work with nathan. i'm not gonna push for it, just discuss and weigh out the benefits. the only issue is risking alienating nick/nifty/andy when it comes down to the nitty gritty so like i said i'm not gonna hold nathan at gunpoint or anything. i'm just gonna do what nathan wants this week honestly because he's trying to carry me to the merge and honestly i'm not complaining because he's gonna get the heat for stuff that i have the backseat influence on which is better for my chances.

this is a weird melting pot of ideas and thoughts, i'm just rambling at this point. mainly because i have a liiiiiiiiitle bit of paranoia that it's not ryan, it's actually me, which is why i'm not gonna like bend over backwards to make sure ryan's safe or anything. can't risk that vote flipping over to me

"azorella"

- Hooooly fuuuuuck, is anyone prepared for a long-ass confessional? (Ed. Note (Zakriah): this isn't even remotely close to his longest confessional) BECAUSE I SURE AM!

So, last night, I was just chilling - happy that we won immunity - then Marie messaged me. She said that she wanted to form a majority alliance. And I was like 'oop'. However, I cleverly convinced her to want an alliance of me/her/Cali/Josephine, as I trust Cali & Josephine the most on this tribe - and if we're put into another alliance like this together, that kinda thrusts us into the position where we're a threesome in this game. However, we won't just be a threesome, but the most powerful damn threesome you've ever layed your eyes upon! And, yeah - I'd really be chill with a three-person Cali/Josephine/I 'Ringleaders' alliance, because I think that's where things are heading.

Additionally, not only 15 minutes after Marie messaged me, Ryan ALSO messaged me - same sorta thing, 'I really trust you Aren and I wanna work with you yada yada' and after awhile, I also got him to agree upon a me/him/Cali/Josephine alliance.

So, the first thing that I've gathered here is that people really, reaaaally trust and like me. Cali's another person who seems to be very well-liked.

Josephine, however, has been rustling feathers. It took me quite a bit to convince Ryan to let Josephine into the alliance; like, damn, he put up a fight to put a target on her back. He was saying that she was rude to him in a conversation they had, and that she's close to Zakriah - yada, yada, yada. And, y'know, even if the Zakriah stuff is true, I'm tight with Zakriah too. That would mean that a me/Zakriah/Josephine thing could be potential later down the road. And, hey! More power, more galore!

Honestly, this is so cray cray because I have an alliance with every single person in the damn tribe other than Adrian at this point. And, before I know it, Adrian will ALSO be begging me for an alliance. Bloody hell.

"Trent"

- LMAOOOOOOO felix is the WORST liar ever. nathan told me felix was heavily involved in the plan to boot ryan so i go to felix and play myself up a little bit so like i could get some info out of him and what does he say?? ""idk i've heard nothing yet lol"" now i'm no statistician but this math doesn't line up.... so nathan and i are givin it a laugh and felix agrees to keep me updated.... 10 minutes later felix comes saying ""oh ive heard ryan from a few people"" BITCH did you manage to talk to the entire damn tribe in 10 minutes? i think NOT. so basically felix is sketchy as fuck and any semblance of a chance that i work with him legitimately has been ruined at this point.

also i love nathan but GOD he is being so idiotic about the vote. i'm sorry but why would you not want to keep a 5th number around and give us a stronger majority than a weak 4-3? i'm worried hes gonna be screwing me out by not keeping ryan and im gonna beat his ass for it. not to mention he didnt seem phased AT ALL when he said nick nifty and felix were the three fighting hardest to send ryan home and i told him that was the exact group of three i had a feeling was doing it..... like dude they clearly have an alliance going and all you're doing is enabling it.

anyways now i want to vote felix out because he is being SO SHADY but its all about timing and if i encourage a blindside that would be hard to pull off this early i'm not gonna succeed in this game... sigh.

"couvruex"

- We voted out Daulton successfully and it reminds me of when I lost my voting virginity back in my first 703 season. :') I've come such a long way as a player and person since then. We had a challenge which I woke up late for (I seriously just about had a meltdown) and it was super close fought. In the end we finished posting last, but won miraculously by default because another tribe made a mistake before us. WHEW. I'm actually really starting to grow fond of these people and I wouldn't really want to vote them out. Well, I would but there are some filthy rats on the other tribes I would just LOVE to vote out first. I also started my strategy of flirting (it lowkey is also because I ain't getting dick) and hopefully I have some sort of charm that works on these people.

"gallieni"

- It's so shitty we lost that immunity UGHhhh D: sigh. We honestly had such good teamwork all throughout and lost because of a minor mistake that coulda happened to any of us, so I don't blame Nifty at all. We all coulda & shoulda been rechecking the thread periodically, so it's all of our faults. so it goes

Someone gotta go. It ain't gonna be me, Trent, Miguel, or Nathan, know that. So far legitimately everyone has been pussyfooting around the vote, being all skiddish n shit with giving a name. I get it though, I don't want any of us to go unfortunately.

But.... I decided to take the lead and start campaigning to get Nick out. He's a very nice guy & learned today that he smokes weed lol which is so surprising but also amazing, but game-wise I just feel like he'd be the hardest to trust/work with moving forward. So yeah sorry Nick rip but I've been slowly planting the seed for him to be the vote all day lol

I've talked to Nathan, Trent, Miguel, Andy, & Felix about the possibility of voting Nick and they've all been perceptive to the idea, so bloop. There's 2 hours til deadline and as of rn that's where the scale seems to be tippingRaccoonmeat17 (talk) but we'll see

"gallieni"

- I'm proud of myself for taking the proactive role this vote!!! SM Ryan is shook.

Then again now i'm hearing i'm the vote. ctfu oh well

"gallieni"

- Yeah so I flopped i'm pretty sure? Literally hate everyone on this tribe now omfg THESE HOES AIN'T LOYAL.

I'm dragging & exposing them all on my parchment idgaf

"gallieni"

- As for who's actually going home tonight, it's probably going to be Ryan, which tears me up. Anyone going home tonight tears me up. We're all hungry for this chance to redeem ourselves so to end someone's second chance soon, sucks. Ultimately though it's what needs to be done, and even though Ryan is a solid guy, it's way too damn early for me to stick my neck out for anyone so long as I'm secure.

There will always be this nagging paranoia at the back of my mind though that I'm the one going home so I'm just hoping that I can find this idol soon and alleviate some of that fear. As far as things go though, I could be in a much worse position right now.

"couvreux"

- Daulton unfriended me :( But he still watcing my story for now so aiiiiii

"azorella"

- It seems that I have fallen in this game into a very unique person, that being that I have somehow found myself to be a member of three alliances within my own tribe. The first alliance, the Slaughterhouse Five, is the one that I intend to stay loyal to, and consists of myself, Aren, Jenna, Cali, and Selly; the second alliance is the "Awesome Foursome", consisting of myself, Aren, Cali, and Ry; the third is an as-yet unnamed alliance between myself, Aren, Cali, and Marie. My plan going forward is to keep all three of these pacts under the radar as much as possible. As long as nobody starts rocking the boat, I should be fine. If we do go to tribal council soon, I'm hoping that we'll vote out Adrian, because he's the only person in this game that I'm not currently aligned with. We'll just see what happens.

"gallieni"

- As for who's actually going home tonight, it's probably going to be Ryan, which tears me up. Anyone going home tonight tears me up. We're all hungry for this chance to redeem ourselves so to end someone's second chance soon, sucks. Ultimately though it's what needs to be done, and even though Ryan is a solid guy, it's way too damn early for me to stick my neck out for anyone so long as I'm secure.

There will always be this nagging paranoia at the back of my mind though that I'm the one going home so I'm just hoping that I can find this idol soon and alleviate some of that fear. As far as things go though, I could be in a much worse position right now.

"gallieni"

- So this obviously sucks ass. We just got too overconfident in our chances and didn't even check properly. And now because of one damn ""U"" Gallieni is going to tribal. I'm just frustrated because I did so much work for this challenge and I was sitting in front of a screen for a few hours straight, and all of that means nil now.

So Nifty was the person who cost us our win. It's probably not the best time to break up the "Gallience" (inventive name I know) yet, especially considering it was an error any of us could have made. I'm thinking with a logical head right now though and I'm just going to tamp down on the competitive spirit within me.

"gallieni"

- Thank the LAWD that Ryan seemingly hasn't had the best social game with people these first few days, as that is literally the only legitimate reasoning we have for targeting someone: Not being able to converse with them actively or comfortably. I don't even think he had any deals going on with other people, or if he did they weren't strong ones. It seems like after I got the name out there and had Nick support me with it a bit, the name just caught on and now we seemingly almost have the whole tribe on board with taking out Ryan.

I think the only one who might be hesitant with taking out Ryan is Nathan. I think they might have made some sort of deal or alliance, but if he sees that the entire tribe is going that way, I don't think he'll try to compromise his game this early to save Ryan. Granted if Nathan even is wanting to save Ryan in the first place. Nathan just seems hesitant in general with wanting to put his opinions out there, which is somewhat concerning but I'll let it slide for now since it's still early on and he wants to remain good with everyone most likely.

"couvruex"

- google doc: https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1l3EtN_Ym_pRxxA4tSpqNvSCj0y-Wf8JVXIGHw_jO550/edit?usp=sharing