Board Thread:Survivor 21: Kerala/@comment-30289320-20161208093141/@comment-1928659-20161208212815

Ok I will try to keep this specific. I have already said a lot of things in my main speech and my reply to Daulton.

I have to agree with you on some points and disagree on others. I do not think my social game deteriorated going forward. I do think my paranoia was too much and it hurt me, but I managed to overcome it. I explain why my paranoia was that much in my speech and my pretty extensive answer to Daulton. I was really beat by the time zone and every single time I went to bed thinking I had a plan and then came back to find me targeted and another plan trying to take place. It was normal for me to be paranoid. I should have been less obvious about it I agree with you and this is the biggest flaw of my game. Because for the same reason of me being paranoid and needing doors open and wanting to keep me in the middle, I did some less than average jury management.

The thing is, that I did position up until the F7 myself is such a good way and had acquired all these powers, that I didn' t need to to stretch my social relationships afterwards. I could see Tucker still being a cocky loud speaker running around trying to force things and he was at that point ruining his social game by having extreme target and tense relationships that kept me safe. I didnt need to be safe from F8 to F5 to stay alive. I did some work early on, forged those relationships and entered those groups that let me relax after the F7 and allowed me to take a step back see the game like an external spectator. Thats why at F6 I was able to see all the votes falling and made the move against Catherine, creating a bunch of split people that were all attached more to me than anyone else. I had been placed in a very secure spot. Things could have been turned, but it was highly unlikely they would.

At F4 I had a meltdown and that was totally out of place. I had decided on the move since the moment we reached F4, and you know that because I was the one that I approached you and offered you to vote together no matter what happened. After the immunity, I got some major backlash and the stress of me being more paranoid than I should have been together with having to put up a month of someone trying to own my every word and people calling me bitch before being removed from groups made me really bitter for a moment. I should have went to bed right there and assured you that I was making the move. This was one bad moment though in a game which I was always evaluating very well socially and I don' t think you should vote solely based on that.

I know you respect the fact that I played as hard as humanly possible. I was paranoid and sometimes "too much" because I was really passionate and being voted out was not an option for me. I played the game that ensured me reaching the F3 with a resume to be jealous of. It is very rarely that the person never commitiing to a side manages to slip by. I did it. And I know you give me credit for that. So you can vote for a bad break out I had the moment I learned that all my work had payed off, or you can vote for the game that lasted a whole month and dominated a big part of it. It is your choice guys to choose how this season will end. With a BANG or with a fade out.

Ok I' ll make an effort with the Sith Lords.

Daulton - Darth Vitiate. For like, acting too early (killed his father I think...) and ending up not doing very well.

Jacob - I' ll go with Jacen. The prodigy who ended up failing. Jacob would have kicked our asses had he not gone inactive.

Anna - I did some research, apparently there was a woman named Juhani, she was able to go invisible using a force cloak.

Nicolai - Wasn' t a guy who was a Sith lord and then became a Jedi?? *google searches* Revan! But the other way around. Nicolai became more of a villain towards the end.

Violet - I' ll go ahead and say Padme. Not a jedi or a sith lord. But powerful and beautiful.

Catherine - Nomi Sunrider. Woman jedis FTW!!!

Julia - Ok that was obvious. Princess Leia. She was a blast of energy.

Hope I covered you to some point. If you have further questions I will be around to tell you anything you need!